Unexpected gifts

This is the time of year to see family, to celebrate the birth of an important historic and cultural figure, and to suprise friends and family with momentos of affection. Some people go overboard with presents, some people forget, some people know just what to get their loved ones, and some people need a lot of help. This year has been different for me. My presents have always been thoughtful, but this year I feel particularly good about the presents I have picked out. However, there is something else different about the gift giving this year...The sheer kindness of others; their thoughtfulness has touched me deeply. It seems as though there is an underlying feeling of how much we appreciate each other, which seems deeper and richer than years before. Does this happen as people get older? Or is it something I've changed in the way I view the people around me? Is my love growing with my growing sense of the world?

Sometimes the gift is from someone you didn't expect. This morning one of the salesmen that I haven't been speaking to gave me a gigantic triple chocolate bar from Spain. It made me sad that I didn't deserve it, but I thanked him from the bottom of my heart.

Sometimes the gift isn't for you at all. Cynthia, the receptionist, donated a sheep in my name through Heifer International to a family in a different country. I've wanted to do something nice for people in need but have been so engaged in my own life that I haven't yet. This just makes me feel good about existing.

Sometimes it is a gift to someone else, from someone else. I got Estee some plants for our office. Chris is funny. Sees a romance novel and buys it for her as his gift. Best present ever. She was like, "I love these, I used to read them all the time and this looks like a good one, but, why did he think of this?" I asked him by text and he replies, "It goes so well with the plants." Lol.

Sometimes it was the thought that counts. I took Cass and Terra out to get gifts for their loved ones. The first place we went was the place their father had explicitly asked them not to go because that was what they were going to get for me. I bought heated pillows for their mom, their aunt, and some for us. He was a good salesman. When asked by their father what the heck? they replied "what were we supposed to do, tell her she couldn't buy them?" he said "YES." I told him that they had actually encouraged me to buy them and had fought over the colors. Ah well. I'm enjoying my presents :).

Some are creative and unique. Noone can do it like the Canadians, ay? Melanie actually got Chris and I what we asked for. I asked for a mounty and Chris asked for a polar bear, and while they are inanimate fuzzy little mini versions, they don't take nearly as much food and space. Thanks for the beaver mounty and Chris takes every chance he gets to play with his reversable beaver bear. Nice.

Sometimes it isn't a material gift at all. Spending time with the girls has been a real treat. Shopping with them, while frustrating with the crowds, was really fun. I got to take them out, just the girls, for the first time. I have really appreciated my time not only with them (it feels few and far between) but also with Chris. I could be anywhere, at work, hanging out with friends, wanting to be at home with him instead. And my family, as much as it frustrates me that I don't get to be an adult with them, I appreciate that they want me close. They need me and I need them. I don't like being so far away from my brother and it gets harder with each passing year.

Some of them are little bundles of joy. Granted and rightly, none of them are mine, but God bless all the little ones born this year. So many of our friends have been blessed this year and I've been really excited for all of them. They are all really beautiful babies.

This year feels different to me. It certainly has to do with finally having Chris this year, and wrapping gifts with Cassia, and texting with Terra, finding my place in my family, and doing alright financially, but there is an overall theme this time. Growing up. I'm in the midst of making myself. More responsiblility, more stress, more love, more understanding, more becoming, more ability, more autonomy, more words that need to be said, more things expected from me, more I want to take on, more looking forward to a new year and a new beginning, more friends, more life. What more could I ask for?